(drum roll please)
Anyone but this woman.
Have you noticed that about every twelve months there's one of these stories in the news about the parent/parents who go off on vacation to a foreign country and leave the kids alone in the house? And do you notice they always itemize all the food items in the cupboard, as if to say, "they should shop better for this sort of thing." Well I have, and that's why I wrote my book, "What To Buy When You're Going To A Foreign Country On Vacation And Leaving Your Small Children To Fend For Themselves."
Chapter One: "Your Toddler Can Cook This!"
Chapter Two: "There IS an Alternative To Diapers"
Chapter Three: "Floor Pie Isn't Just a Simpson's Dream"
Chapter Four: "Woody Harrelson Does It, So It Can't Be Wrong - Introducing Your Family to Raw Foodism"
Chapter Five: "'Lord of Flies.' What an AWESOME Novel!"
Chapter Six: "They'll Be Glad You Went When They See The T-Shirts"
LOL...You're too funny.